I feel like I woke at some point during the spring and decided that I needed to make some serious changes. Maybe it’s this birthday — 33, the Jesus year (go Google that if you want to fall down some weird rabbit hole…). But in actuality, it’s been a long time coming.

The NYC I know and love really doesn’t exist any longer. On the surface level, the atmosphere is sterile and the rents no longer justify the return. The people I have hung with hard for years are moving away and that bums me out. The places that make up my history from my youth are being erased just as fast: J&R, Pearl Paint, Grey’s Papaya, Kim’s, all the storefronts around town I have funny memories associated with. On a deeper level though, I’ve been thinking long and hard about what I want my future to look like and I don’t imagine it being in NY at all at this point. The desire to be away outweighs every remaining feeling to keep waving the flag. I’m tired and bored with my town.

Once I just admitted that to myself, things have been shaping up pretty interestingly. Moogfest was more amazing in the expanded format — until the end when I got stuck in Greenville flying back home. Highlights were Metro Area, Jimmy Edgar, a Nile Rodgers chat, interesting panels in general sponsored by Afropunk and Kill Screen. I was so glad I went and will plan to return for the next one in 2016.

Right now, I’m in Europe at the halfway point of 2 week trip. I spent a few days in (freezing) Amsterdam, my first trip, and it was pretty fascinating. A vibrant very walkable place that was both alien and familiar. I met some cool folks who gave me daily life tips on things I would’ve never imagined. I can see myself there. Now getting the heat back in Lisbon and wrapping up in Berlin before home. I’ve always thought of myself as someone who could be comfortable everywhere and it’s pretty true still. It’s been a fun trip and I’m excited to go home and plan out the next moves from there.